The 5 Song Saturday Night Soundtrack

Have your Saturday evenings been lackluster as of late? Been missing that certain spark? Personal soundtracking is an effective and pretentious way to add that special something to your weekend party nights. Without further ado, Uncle Dylan's Five Song Saturday Night Soundtrack.

via finemoviesonline.com

 1. Booker T. & the M.G.’s – Green Onions

It doesn’t matter what sort of adventure you plan to embark on, this classic will immediately validate it. The sharp organ, throbbing baseline, twanging guitars – Green Onions will make you feel like a better and more interesting person than you actually are. That false confidence is going to be a great starting point for your special evening.

2. Bob Dylan – Rainy Day Women #12 & 35

I’d like to preface this entry by stating that I’m not much of a pot smoker. However, regardless of your vice(s), Bob Dylan’s wild refrain of “Everybody must get stoned!” is an apt and compelling chorus to properly begin your night of decadence and sin. The intoxicated horns, slurred vocals, and manic drums will march you from the pregame right out into the field. And the guy who yells “f*** yeah” around the 4:24 mark is just bonus.

3. The Stooges – 1970

To be played extremely loud at what you deem to be the peak of the evening. But beware. This song has been known to take previously normal humans and make them do strange, ungodly things like break dinner plates over their heads and challenge people to arm wrestles. It also has the words “out of my mind on Saturday night” in it, and that kind of poetry just can’t be left off a list of this nature.

Choose your own adventure! What kind of night has it been? If you’ve got a strapping stud or delicate dame on your arm continue onward. If not, skip to songs 4b and 5b.

4. Bruce Springsteen – Prove it all Night

When it comes to naïve, drunken love no one does it quite like The Boss. This song is a personal pick and could theoretically be substituted for Born to Run, Candy’s Room, Jungleland, and over a dozen other similarly themed Springsteen songs. Alternately, try throwing on Pink Cadillac for a bit of distasteful metaphoric fun.

5. Dr. Dre – Big Ego’s

You've done it. A perfect Saturday night. Turn this late 90's track on late and loud. Think about the important stuff, like how much better you are than your friends and how awful you're going to feel tomorrow morning.

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4B. The Smiths – How Soon is Now?

So the night didn’t turn out quite the way you planned. It happens. Turn on this number, slink into the kind of depression that only the mid-80’s can bring, and be happy that you’re not as lonely, morose, and into Oscar Wilde as Morrissey is.

5B. Tom Waits – Eggs and Sausage

Now that you’ve driven yourself into a spiritual desolation, the only proper way to close the evening is by filling your empty stomach (and heart) with heap upon heap of greasy food. Whether you’re a gypsy hack or an insomniac, this lonesome ballad will be the perfect accompaniment to your late night food binge. And what kind of pies?